Surviving

I have found that being a survivor means many things.

My love for life, my family, friends and my God have become the purpose for what I now live. Each day is viewed as a gift that I embrace. (I know, I sound like a Hallmark card....but the words that I write are sincere.)

Surviving cancer means that I will always have to live with more regular checkups, always knowing that the 'medical' world is now my world, being terrified of -the very often- scans is common place in my life, and dealing with my chemo scarred body will be with me during this lifetime.

I saw my doc today and asked a few questions...
1) The ankle pain and foot pain are related. I have what is called Neuropathy. (Please excuse my very novice medical explanation.) We have 2 types of nerves in our body. The chemo drugs from past and present are slowly messing with 1 of these. Thus, what's happening in my ankles and foot. There is medicine for me to try. It works for some better than others. I'm praying I get relief from it. What's happening will most likely continue and probably move to other places. If the medicine works for me....I should be good. If not....we'll cross that bridge IF we have to. He also said swimming and massage are great for this. The swimming will be hard, as I have so many children :) But the massage I am more than game for.

2) I have had mouth sore this time around. Getting them is very common when going through normal chemo, NOT maintenance. But hellooooo...this is me we're talking about. I always have to be different, huh?! So please pray that this was a one time thing. Very painful and a very hard thing to deal with when trying to brush your teeth.

3) We talked about how long I would be doing my maintenance chemo. Originally it was to be 5 years. But then things became such a miracle situation that it was talked about it lessoning. Basically, I'm looking at a long time of this. It's up to me, the scans and my doc. He personally feels the longer the better. Remember, it's helping to kill and keep at bay any cancer that may be laying dormant in me. So if it's gonna keep me healthy....keep it coming.

And now to answer some random questions that many of you have asked:
I can go on vacation and 'miss' a chemo appointment. I can drink coffee (which I do regularly because I have a Starbucks addiction.) I can do most any type of massage but NO chiropractic anything. I DO have 4 children. (Takai 1 1/2, Torryn 4 this Sunday, Tala 7 1/2 & Tylor 14) I would choose the same exact doctors if I had to do it all again. I am from Maui, Hawaii. And I can get a tattoo

Please pray for :
*The medicine to work. Walking is becoming very difficult to do with the pain.
*My back pain to not get any worse. I am so thankful that it seems to 'just be'.
*We are down to 1 vehicle. Roy's truck is done and we don't have the option to get another one. This will be a hard thing to juggle with doctor's appointments for me and the kids, along with school next month.
*My veins to continue to hold out and be strong. It was talked about again today. I do NOT want another port....
*My upcoming surgeries. Reconstruction & Hysterectomy. I have no dates yet, but need all the prayer I can get in this area.
*SPECIAL PRAYER REQUEST*--Tristen. He is a month old and while in the hospital contacted MRSA. This is a very serious form of Staph. At this young age, he is very vulnerable and fragile. Please pray with me that his little body would be healed from the sores, fever and everything else that he's fighting.

My life has forever changed from cancer. But nothing will ever be taken for granted since I have been blessed with being a SURVIVOR. I embrace more and love deeper because of this title. It's one I will be grateful for the rest of this lifetime.